When studying the family, there are many different types of structures used to explain the family unit. One of the more popular theories is the family systems theory. In this theory, it is believed that everyone in the family plays a role in which the family operates. There are many different set ups of the family, but this one explains the role of every individual and how they impact the family.
While some behaviors that members of a family unit could be personally harmful to themselves, these people will continue to take part in these harmful actions if they believe it is beneficial to the rest of the family unit. In an outsider perspective, it may seem that harmful behaviors would be ridiculous to help the family dynamic. However, if an individual feels the need to play the role of ‘black sheep’ to bring other members of the family closer together, they will do so.
Not all families are the same, and that goes along with the example stated above. Each family has unspoken rules that are learned once they are broken, such as locking the bathroom door after entering. While this may seem like the average thing to do, as a child, you must learn to do this after a sibling walks in. These rules are unspoken and not necessarily known at times until the person starts to live on their own, free to do what they want, or when the rule is broken. Rules are another important role in the family dynamic, which can create a healthy environment or one that is less than desirable.
There are also many other things that impact the family dynamic, the next one I am going to discuss is the boundaries that are made. There are three types of boundaries that can be implemented when making a family: open, clear, and closed. The names of these boundaries are exactly as the names imply them to be. Open boundaries is when the relationship between two individuals is when one knows or does more than what is socially acceptable. An example of a parent that has open boundaries with their children is when a mother does all of the work that the child does not want to partake in. This creates an unhealthy relationship between the child and mother, as the child relies constantly on the mother to fix their problems for them. Eventually, when the child must leave home, they will not know how to interact with the world, or expect everyone to help them constantly. The next type of unhealthy boundary between parents and children is closed. These closed boundaries often lead to negligence or show that the parents do not care for their children. Without any interaction or shared agreement, the child feels as if their actions will not be noticed by their parents. This usually results in children doing things that would try to get any sort of reaction out of their parents, even if they know it is harmful. The last type of boundary we have is a clear boundary. These clear boundaries are set and stated by the parents and enforced to the point that the children will be able to follow them willingly. These parents usually listen to children as they age and may change certain boundaries after their children constantly follow the rules and regulations given to them.
These family dynamics that take place are all occurring trying to reach homeostasis in the home. Homeostasis is the ability to balance out input and output of a certain thing that is being studied, in this case, it is the family unit. Each person in the family unit plays a role trying to find balance in their homes, and the balance will look different from family to family. The ideal family is one in which the two spouses are equals, and are one in the same. These parents should give clear boundaries to their children that they agree on together. When we have a functional, developed family, the world is able to grow.
The youth are the future of the world. When we find value in a loving family, we can find peace in our own homes.
Until next week!
-Grace Coria
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